“And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
King James Version (KJV)
Adam's comment on 2020-05-04 21:35:25:
Also take a look at Matthew 13:57 - Jesus had the same problem with his family not respecting him.
Chris's comment on 2020-05-04 21:02:02:
Ann, if I could add here: you're an adult now, but bear in mind that your parents will always look at you as their 'little girl". Even if you were 60 yrs old & they were 90, you would be still considered in the same way. With that in mind, often parents fail to re-examine & revise their parental position & responsibilities when dealing with older, mature offsprings. Consider all the problems so many have with in-laws: it all boils down to, "I know what I'm doing, don't interfere in my family's matters".
We sense your pain & frustration, even though you should accept that you are NOT insignificant to them, it's just that they fail to know exactly where to leave off their input to you & where their advice would really be needed by you. I'm sure you have valued their advice over the years, especially when you had your first child, but now you're feeling the pressure as their 'advice' still continues to swamp you unabatedly.
As Adam has noted, we don't know all the circumstances involved here, but any advice given can only be of a general nature. I suggest that when they tell you what to do or how to bring up your kids, thank them for the advice & that you will take it away & give it due consideration (in this way, you are acknowledging their input & concern for you but you are the one who will take responsibility for the final decision).
You will indeed need to consider their advice & be introspective & ask yourself whether they are right, even to some extent, or whether you need to change or do things differently, or if their advice was completely wrong. After due consideration, you can come back to them & relate how their advice has helped you, or how you have modified it, or in fact how you realize you could do things differently. What you are doing, is showing your appreciation for their concern & advice, yet demonstrating that YOU gave it due consideration & have made the decision & will act upon it. In this way, they & you will respect each other more.
Adam's comment on 2020-05-04 15:07:51:
It's likely they love you and don't show it in a way you prefer. Some parents care much, but show it in a way that can be perceived as overbearing and critical or disrespectful. They may not know they're actions can be viewed that way. So, if you want things to change I think one would need to take a risk and communicate exactly what words you perceive as offensive and be specific. "When I hear you say ______, I feel ____. Can you please not say that?" Go through each word one by one, not leaving anything out. If not in person then at least a letter. They probably aren't aware they're doing anything wrong, so I would at least make that 100% clear in specific detail what you want. If they don't know what you want they shouldn't be expected to do anything differently. Be aware of that they may also wish you'd change something and haven't said it either, so don't be surprised when asking them to change that they bring up something for you to change too. This is just an opinion from limited info. God bless you!
Cole's comment on 2020-05-04 13:42:49:
I don't think they're very toxic... Not saying they aren't but.. Maybe they're troubled inside. I pray that you find the answers to this. And I sure do pray that you find resolution to such an issue. In times like any.. Be sure to remain thankful to God as Job did. He will surely reward you.
Emmanuel Mawuli.'s comment on 2015-05-26 07:53:32:
It is true that any word proceeded out of the mouth of God is True and Perfect. Parents in all, must be an example and in like manner of God the Father so that, we their children may live that life to other generations. For what we see from them as a child that we do. Thanks.
AMEN JAY's comment on 2014-11-06 04:00:01:
let us conduct our self as a parent at all time because we are like a mirror to our children,so that our deeds might not provoke them but bring them into admonition of our lord
Mockingbird's comment on 2014-11-06 03:42:20:
Parents ought to be in a prayer attitude to know who to bring up their children It is difficult at times to know how to discipline children. I need to go by the leadership of Holy Spirit to know what to do. The first thing God will not discipline me to provoke me to wrath neither should I provoke my child.
Monica D's comment on 2014-07-02 17:12:46:
My husband and son stays into with each other. Husband don 't think anybody in the household is right about anything. When you express your feeling a person is lying. Times are to the point of someone getting hurt or dying. I the mother becomes bitches and whores because I know for a fact he wrong. The last one of my children is not as strong as the rest of the family and he tries not to react to things but if you keep pushing him more like provoking him his anger becomes violence and his daddy think in his mind that he is not provoking his child. What do I do?
marjorie's comment on 2014-06-25 02:52:13:
I believe this instruction is given to fathers ' to help children adhere to the 1st commandment with promise... honor and obey thy father and thy mother so that it will be well with them and they will have long life on this earth. If one provokes their child to wrath and anger the child is in danger of reacting disrespectful towards their elders thus not being able to be led in wisdom nor compassion... A lack of respect or trust for those in authority.
Kevin's comment on 2014-06-18 08:25:30:
This verse needs to be adhered to , because if a child is brought up in a harsh household, he she will most likely become like the parent and even show that type of behavior with the general public, making life difficult and hard for the person to get along with others.
Mcbie G Chiriseri's comment on 2014-01-26 00:29:35:
Yes l belive that's true
KEYONTA's comment on 2012-12-14 07:56:01:
I BELIEVE THAT IS THE TRUTH.